Years ago, I founded a very small local manufacturing company that designed emergency backpacks. I spent months putting together kits that contained emergency food, water, and supplies that one might need should an unplanned disaster arise. After many days designing, planning, and finally assembling these backpacks, it came time to market them. I had the idea to take an assembled backpack to a local hardware store for them to sell. And that’s where I got scared and almost quit. I stressed myself out with the thought that they would laugh at my product. My head filled with doubts, and It stalled me out for several months — it just felt too big and intimidating.
Then one day, as I was driving past said hardware store, I had an epiphany. In my mind’s eye, I was able to draw myself out of the emotion of the situation. I could see from the vantage point of looking down from high above. I could see myself walking into the hardware store, showing my creation to the owner, and I could see that he loved it. Why wouldn’t he? It was something that no one else was producing at the time. It was a win for the store, and certainly a win for me. I could see it. I could feel it. It felt so good!
So the very next day, I went into the store and met with the owner. He did love it! We drew up a contract, and the backpacks had their own special rack in a place they couldn’t be missed. I did it!
The experience taught me a very valuable truth: in order to do great things, I had to change my perspective to get out of my own way.
I often share the visualization technique I learned from my experience with my clients. I find so many times that people sabotage their success and their utmost desires because subconsciously they don’t feel worthy or deserving of such greatness.
So here’s some suggestions for you, the next time you talk yourself out of asking for that raise, or you get passed over for a promotion, or you chicken out from asking that hottie on a date, or whatever you are doing to keep yourself from succeeding:
Ask yourself specifically what you are afraid of. Don’t judge, just ask. Let the answer come on its own.
See yourself doing the very thing you want to do, but are afraid of.
As you see this in your mind, ask: ‘how does this feel?’ ‘What am I doing differently?’
Ask yourself what’s the worst thing that could happen if you “fail?”
Start with the end in mind — see yourself living the very result you want, then work it backward.
If you can’t figure out why you keep sabotaging yourself, ask a trusted mentor or friend to show you your blind spots.
I’m sure you’ve heard the affirmation “I can do hard things.” It’s true — you can. Some of the most rewarding moments of your life happen because you pushed forward when you wanted to quit. I’ve heard it said that a good decision will feel right in your head and wrong in your feet — the fear of the unknown can cause you to second-guess yourself. Don’t do it — take a deep breath, reassess the situation, and pull back until you can see from a new perspective. See your success. Feel it. Then do it.